Be Careful What You Wish For

 Hello Everyone, I hope you're all doing as well as possible and still managing to find reasons to smile although that doesn't get any easier, does it? It seems every day brings another reason to feel less than confident in the way the world is going, with the ongoing conflicts across the globe and increasing uncertainty in the capabilities of those in charge. Here in the UK, our news has been dominated by the recent death of One Direction singer, Liam Payne. As happens when a celebrity dies, there's been something of a feeding frenzy in the media to try and publish every detail of the last few hours of his life. It all strikes me as remarkably distasteful, using someone else's tragedy to gain a readership/viewers and listeners. How easy it seems to be; to forget beyond any celebrity status, he was a human being with family and friends who are obviously overwhelmed by grief. But the relentless paparazzi seem to have little or no interest in giving anyone privacy instead they prefer to pursue those directly affected with all the ruthlessness of a predator. I feel it's a forlorn hope that they will leave anyone alone who is even vaguely connected to Liam, but I still hope for the best. I did not know him personally but for a life to end in such a terrible way is a tragedy, but we mustn't forget, sadly, his situation is not unique. There are so many people struggling with substance abuse and mental health problems, some who will lose their lives today, but their passing will go largely unnoticed by the wider world simply because they weren't famous. But their lives are equally important and it's a travesty, that in the modern world, mental health services are so criminally underfunded.

As regular readers will know, many years ago I was diagnosed with severe depression which is now called, MDD or Major Depressive Disorder. As it's been a part of my life for so long, I can cope with its effects most of the time but that doesn't mean I have somehow overcome the illness-I haven't. There are weeks when all I want to do is just run away somewhere when my life seems intolerable, as if a new location will somehow make me feel better. Obviously, it wouldn't work, as however fast or far I might go, I'd be taking the problem with me - myself. There is no escaping your own mind and mine really isn't helpful when the dark clouds start to form but that doesn't stop me scrolling through travel locations and trying to work out if I could get there. In that state, there really is no logic involved at all, it's just a raw desire to 'get away.'

But what would I do if there was an option? If it was possible? Could I really pack a small bag and just walk out of my life, away from my family and friends without so much as a backward glance? The answer is a resounding 'No!' So, you see, if I did get what I wished for, would it magically make me happy? Again 'No.' Oh, I don't doubt for those first moments, or even days, it would be wonderful but then when that time passed, what would I be like? I think it's very likely the depression would swiftly raise its ugly head and would be joined by the crippling guilt of hurting those closest to me.

We all know we cannot run away from ourselves but that doesn't stop us trying, does it? Some drink or take drugs to escape their own minds for a while, whereas others abandon the real world completely and opt for a fantasy life within a video game. If, for a moment, we glance at that second option, how many people create characters that are the complete opposite of themselves? As an example, the shyest person will have a dominant avatar- possibly dressed in ornate armour while wielding fearsome weaponry. Another who finds it almost impossible to speak to anyone they find sexually attractive, within the game environment, becomes a charming, sexual being that is irresistible. I wonder if they daydream about how different their lives would be if they could just be more like the created character. They might even wish for such a change, but if it somehow happened, would they really be happy? Or would the daily toil of fighting mythical beasts become too much? Would that ornate armour cause them pain? And, perhaps most importantly, even if they had multiple sexual experiences, that's no guarantee of finding lasting love and, in fact, leaves you feeling almost nothing. 

So that's why I think we do need to be very careful what we wish for because as the saying goes, there's always the risk we might get it. Perhaps you're familiar with the Greek myth about King Midas who wanted everything he touched to turn to pure gold which must have sounded like a great idea until his daughter became nothing more than a glittering statue. Fortunately, he was able to reverse his wish, and everything turned back to normal but the vast majority of us don't have that choice- we have to live with our decisions and that's not always easy. 

Anyway, before I go, I do want to say, I'm not against wishing for things, very often they are the inspiration to make positive changes or give us direction. I'm just suggesting, it might be best to be careful and consider all the possible consequences. 

Anyway, you're probably wishing this post would end, well that's one thing I can do, so without further delay, I'll say, stay very safe and as always..

Take very good care out there xx