Hoping for Some Clarity
Well, my friends, it has been too long since I was last here but, in my defence, things have been more than slightly chaotic over these past weeks. I wish I could say, the chaos was only within the walls of chez Turner, but that's a long way from the truth. I know quite a large part of the world is still struggling against the Coronavirus, but for the purpose of this post, I'll focus on where I am right now, the United Kingdom. Although even the briefest glimpse of the news, shows this country is not alone in its confusion.
Back in March, which feels like years ago, our PM sombrely informed us all about the pandemic and the need for a total lockdown to control the spread of the virus. Although there were a very few people who attempted to dismiss the whole thing as a hoax, I think it's true to say, most of us did as we were asked. The towns quickly became deserted, people, (myself included), scurried to the shops and back, not daring to venture out for any longer than the prescribed hour. I think we all thought, at worst, things would stay that way for maybe a couple of months before returning to normality. Obviously, we were very much mistaken. The weeks became months and frustration grew, as jobs were lost, shops failed to re-open, every kind of family event was cancelled and the enforced isolation grew too much to bear.
But, only a month or so ago, there appeared to be a light at the end of the tunnel, the schools re-opened, the hospitality industry awoke, meaning bars and restaurants became busy again - allbeit with safety restrictions in place, transport services resumed and 'normal' seemed almost within our grasp. But, as I write this to you, those hopes were false and now, large swathes of the country are locked down again. Already, my local supermarket is rationing food once more, obviously hoping to avoid the panic buying which happened at the beginning of the pandemic. It almost feels as if the door to normality was half open, but has now been slammed shut in our faces. Yet again, we are 'treated' to gloomy officials, reading out ever increasing numbers which state the number of cases is rising rapidly, before adding their own predictions which are never- even slightly- optimistic.
Depending on which branch of government they represent, we are all allegedly facing catching the virus ourselves or staring down the barrel of economic ruin. These two debates are liberally peppered with talk of the apparent imminent collapse of the health service, homelessness on an epic scale - not to mention, the arts world doomed to never recover. As you can imagine, all this talk does little or nothing towards raising the overall morale of the general population, but far worse than being doom-laden, is the plain fact, none of the so-called experts actually agree with each other.
On the one hand are the scientists, the main two spokesmen, who are undoubtedly two of the most depressing people I have ever heard. As they stand at their lecterns, grimly predicting the end of us all, there are others within the media, who clearly feel, their sums just don't add up ! They freely admit things are not the best but with a few minor adjustments, life could definitely restart - but the government scientists shake their heads and stick to their own belief - we are basically doomed. So in this one instance, who are we supposed to believe ?
To mask or not to mask ? That is another question. Speaking personally, I have opted to mask up, now whether I need too, who knows ? But I came to the conclusion, if wearing a mask not only helps to prevent me catching the virus but also stops me potentially passing it on to others, it seems a fair thing to do. But even this simple gesture seems to bring about divided opinion, countless people, flatly refuse, as they obviously believe wearing a mask somehow infringes on their human rights. At the other end of the scale, there are those who, when approaching a mask-less person, fling themselves to one side in a desperate attempt to avoid possible contamination. They walk along the road in so much protective equipment, you'd be forgiven for thinking they were on their way to perform brain surgery ! But who is right ? Should we all toss aside our masks with reckless abandon or put on full medical gear before setting a single toe outside the house ? When faced with this dilemma, if we turn to the 'experts', well, you see what I mean, more confusion.
Sadly the same can be said of how the country itself is going, listen to some and we are heading for the bleak days of Depression, listen to others and the 'green shoots of recovery' are clearly visible. Speaking personally, like many others, my original plans for 2020, are little more than a distant memory now, so the future is far from certain. I have adopted the 'take one day at a time' approach as there is almost no point making even the simplest of predictions - as long as there is a roof over our heads and some food in the refrigerator, I will take that as a win.
On the wider scale, the mood in the country is now less about 'all pulling together' and more about, 'I really don't care anymore.' Sadly, our government does not seem able to stick to one plan for longer than a week, so things that were allowed on Monday might well be limited or completely banned by Friday. I really don't think any of us can keep up so it's understandable why many people have just lost patience. Obviously the threat of the virus hasn't suddenly vanished, but when there doesn't appear to be an actual plan, well, it's starting to feel as if those in charge, are much more damaging to us all.
Despite everything, I do try and stay hopeful, but I am acutely aware, the longer this goes on, I fail more than I succeed - hope is harder to find. I am waiting, like most of the world, to see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel, but as yet, it feels we are nowhere near yet. As regular readers know, I do struggle with depression and I have to admit, there have been more than a few very bleak days. I am eternally grateful to family and good friends who don't allow me to get too lost in my own personal darkness. As a side note, I am also thankful for those I know through social media too and yes, I am well aware of all the misgivings some people have about connecting with others online. All I can say, is I have been extremely fortunate in those I have met, I have learned a great deal from many of them and I never take their presence for granted. When you are suffering an especially low mood, to be able to see pictures of your friends' families, to read posts about their lives in countries all over the world - it doesn't cure anything, but it does make you feel much less alone.
So, in closing, I hope we will all see the clouds of this virus lift, I also hope - more than anything- those in power will FINALLY announce a real and lasting plan. If we could have some concrete assurance, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and they know how to reach it, it would make the darkness so much easier. Whichever country you might call home, I hope you and your family, not only survive this pandemic, but thrive when life returns to normal.
Thank you so much to all those who reach out to me, it's more appreciated than you could possibly imagine and be assured, I send nothing but love and good thoughts to all of you.
Take care out there xxxx
