The Brightest Star

Hello Everyone, I hope you're all doing really well, staying cool if you're in the Northern Hemisphere and warm if you're in the South. I'm sorry I haven't been here until now, but I've been dealing with a great many domestic problems as well as working on the new book. I can't say too much about it, but I'm hopeful it will resonate with readers when it's released which won't be for quite a while yet. 

Anyway, I wanted to write today after hearing about the sad news about singer/actress Olivia Newton John who has lost her battle with cancer. There have been many tributes to her, many about her role as Sandy in 'Grease', her recording career etc. but far more about just what a wonderful person she was and how inspirational. Countless people have shared their memories of her kindness, warmth and her bravery in the face of such an awful disease. Ignoring her own poor health, she made it her mission to try and help others in many different ways which all proved to be largely successful. As I was reading the words of those who knew her, it struck me, what an amazing legacy she has left, to be remembered with such fondness and for people to feel how blessed they were that she came into their lives. Without being morbid, I have to admit, I did start to wonder what I might leave in the world when it's my turn to go from this life and onto whatever happens next.

Obviously, primarily there are my two daughters, who will continue to create wonderful things in their lives, gain more knowledge and be considered good people by those around them. But for me to claim any of their future success, is just plain wrong, any more than I can say my late mother's achievements are mine. So, what will mine be? That I wrote books maybe, or travelled around the planet a few times, met some extraordinary people and also had to deal with the worst some can do-but none of those things come anywhere close to the example set by Olivia.

As so many have talked about her as a person, it would naturally follow, maybe I need to look at myself - something I try and avoid at all costs as my flaws are glaringly apparent. But in an effort to ignore my low opinion, I tried to think of some of the good bits as after all, there had to be some. Again, my thoughts turned to my daughters, both of whom have grown into women who abhor discrimination of all kinds, are inclusive and, I believe, would stand up for anyone who feels vulnerable. Now, I completely admit they probably came to having this standpoint through their own life experience, but I like to imagine, maybe I had some small influence on them when they were young. They never heard me say anything remotely racist or homophobic, while, more than once, they would have listened to me rant about some societal injustice. But, as I'm sure you've noticed, I'm mentioning them again- I appreciate it's annoying but, in my defence, I've been a mother for as long as I can remember.

So, still trying to separate myself from the maternal role, what would people say if they were asked to talk about me? Well, hopefully, at least a few would say I worked hard and wanted the best for them. I can also imagine more than one saying, my love of a great innuendo joke was alarming but just about bearable. I would also really like to believe that people knew I cared about them and not just through words but in actions too. When you think about it, isn't that what we are all trying to be? Just decent, good people who cause as little harm as possible as we go through life. But it's not always easy, is it? Sometimes despite our best efforts, we fall into being angry, resentful or even downright mean, it's not generally intended but we all have our limits. I suppose the most positive thing to say about these moments, is it just makes us all human with failings, so as long as we don't make being negative a lifestyle choice, we will soon get back on track.

When you look out at the wider world, there's no escaping the fact, there are some seriously unpleasant people in the world - aside from the obvious horrors who commit the worst crimes. Sadly, I don't think any of us get through life without meeting at least one person who seems hellbent on being as objectionable as possible. I can assure you; I have had my share of them, and they have all left their mark, some lasting longer than others. Strangely, it was often the things they did not do which caused so much more pain than the things they did but that's for another day.

After this rambling, where am I left on what my legacy might be? Well, I think it's extremely unlikely I will be as loved and admired as Olivia but that doesn't mean trying to be the best I can be, isn't a worthwhile ambition. I was once told, truly acknowledging your weaknesses can often be your greatest strength, so that might be a good place to start.

Finally, personalities to one side, I don't want to go without saying, I'm so thankful that with your encouragement, I have written books as they will certainly outlive me. They might not be the greatest works of literature, but it's comforting to think, long after I'm gone, someone might sit down and read the words I wrote so many years earlier. They might think they know nothing about A.B. Turner, but the truth is, everything that is worth knowing is within those pages.

To those who knew and loved Olivia personally, obviously I send my condolences, to all her countless fans, I know it's hard to believe now, but every time you play a song or watch a movie, you'll feel she hasn't really gone completely, it will be more like she is just in another room. But regardless of your feelings about her music or her professional career, there's no denying, she was a star in a far more important way than being a mere celebrity.

Well, that's more than enough from me, so look after yourselves, oh and thank you to those who have been in touch about 'Barefoot on the Grass', I'm so happy you found it entertaining, until the next time...

Take care out there xx