Lockdown Anniversary and the Passage of Time
Well, my friends, I hope everyone is well and, wherever you might be, the sun is shining on you. I am sadly aware of the flooding in New South Wales, Australia and I am sure we all hope somehow the authorities get help to all those who have been evacuated while trying to ensure, everything which can be done, is happening as soon as possible. Obviously, also, we should all be thinking of those affected by the terrible loss of life in Atlanta where a lone gunman took the lives of innocent people. Here in the UK, I think we are all still trying to make some sense out of the shocking abduction and murder of a young woman in London, let's hope her family and friends are left to grieve without any further media intrusion. Now, with all those events given the respect they deserve, I can now move forward with the topic of this particular post - here in the UK, we have reached almost exactly a year since the nationwide lockdown was announced, so an anniversary of sorts but not one I shall be in any great rush to celebrate, along with most of the population. I don't think any of us had any real idea of what we were really facing when the Prime Minister sombrely informed us, our lives were about to take a dramatic turn.
Just before the announcement, my life had seemed brimming over with exciting possibilities, after a few difficult years, it felt as if things were going to start changing for the better. So, when the whole country was effectively closed, it took me a couple of weeks to really grasp the enormity of the situation. I remember walking into town and seeing nothing but deserted streets, the usual bustling crowds had seemingly evaporated overnight. When I reached the supermarket, the staff were already looking exhausted and harassed, as certain customers loaded their shopping baskets with endless tins of food, toilet rolls and anything else they could physically drag out through the doors. It would only be a matter of days before rationing was introduced, when it became clear, some people had stockpiled what they felt were 'essential' items, showing scant regard for anyone else's needs. It doesn't feel as if it was long, before mandatory masks were a necessity and we were all given strict instructions, to only go out for as brief a time as possible. When this directive was ignored by some, suddenly fines were introduced and even meeting friends was strongly discouraged. I know most of the world went through a similar experience, but did any of us believe it would last this long? I don't think so.
If nothing else, this past year has proved what is really important in life - good health, being able to spend time with loved ones and the importance of making the most of every moment you get to share. I know I have looked back and wished I had not 'put off' quite so many arrangements when I was still free enough to enjoy them- it was almost physically painful to recall moments I could have shared with others but had cancelled because I had decided it could happen 'another time.' I think we have all realised, those 'other times' are not guaranteed, life is never a straightforward business and, if nothing else, this lockdown year has proven that fact, beyond doubt. I can't speak for everyone, but there is a part of me that feels I have been robbed of the past year and everything it could have contained. I have to admit to feeling as if it has all been grossly unfair to take such a large piece of our lives, but then I remember, how incredibly fortunate I am to still be here. So many families have lost loved ones, this year has been nothing but heart-breaking for them and, I feel only embarrassment when I hear myself whining about how 'hard' my own life has been. Our politicians talk about life returning to 'normal' soon, but for those in mourning, well, any sense of normal won't be so easy to reach anymore. As for those who have lost jobs and income, who are facing the uncertainty of even having a roof over their heads- their lives are also permanently changed.
As I write this today, we are now in a step-by-step process which allegedly will lead to our nation starting to function again, but I can't help but wonder if anything will be as it was when the lockdown began- I really don't think so. Speaking personally, I try hard not to look back too often, as when I have done, it's way too easy to fall into the abyss of depression, so I now consciously try to live each day as it comes, while attempting to maintain some hope for the future. My hopes are really very simple, to be able to see loved ones again, to be able to travel without any restrictions and to wake up each day, feeling as if anything is possible- not especially mind-blowing in the grand scheme of things but, for me, those few things would make life truly worth living again.
Finally, an anniversary marks a passage of time, what a precious commodity that has turned out to be ! I know I've talked before about not taking anything for granted. But I believe time itself is something we can wrongly assume is endless, how often we will say, 'I'll do that next week', 'I'll catch up with you soon' ? Instead of remembering the old saying, about the only time we really have, is now. I know I am going to try and remember those wise words, when the lockdown comes to an end.
Take care out there xx
